Please do this personality test with me.

Let's say that on Monday you had a CAT scan to know if the thing growing inside you is really a tumor or something - anything - else.
Let's say that you can get the results on Friday.
And let's say that you are getting married next Tuesday.

DO YOU WANT TO KNOW THE RESULTS OR NOT?

The Lion King says no.
"I don't want to know it until after our wedding because if I do know and it's bad, then I will immediately start looking for an urologist, biopsy, hospital ... and there were be no more time or place for a wedding."

OK, I understand that.

But
the Lion King also says "As long as I don't know, I have hope."

NO 

AS LONG AS I DON'T KNOW, I HAVE UNCERTAINTY.

AND I CAN'T LIVE WITH UNCERTAINTY.

I AM GETTING MARRIED IN LESS THAN A WEEK AND I DON'T EVEN CARE ABOUT IT,
ALL I WANT
IS TO KNOW
I AM GETTING MARRIED AND I CAN'T WAIT UNTIL THAT DAY IS OVER 
BECAUSE I NEED TO KNOW.

So yeah.
That's the kind of people we are.

Now, there are 2 things I can do:

- Nothing. 
I do nothing and I know nothing and I try to keep my neurotic soul under control.

- I check the results online without him knowing. I have his username and password. I just have to wait until he sleeps in order to get his phone because they send a text with code at every login.
Then I check his results.
And then, if they're bad, I have to be able to keep a (neurotic though) hopeful face and not tell him in any case.

The chances that I am able to do all that are
to say the least
tiny.
I'm a dreadful lier and I can't keep anything hidden from him.

What will I do?

Bets are open.

Because I have no idea either.

clara